On seeing and remembering

Winter has begun to show its face here. Most of the leaves that are going to fall to the ground have done so. It's time to get out the blower and the rakes. What remains of the canopy in the woods, other than the ubiquitous and perennial North Carolina pine, are tree skeletons – a favorite photographic subject of mine.

         Best Farm

I’m always surprised when I "discover" that I have a theme or subject that I’ve photographed for years – without being aware of it. How could a subject that I’ve photographed countless times, under multiple conditions, and for years at a time, go unnoticed as a subject of note? The human psyche is a marvel!

Discovery comes as a mixed blessing. On the one hand, it’s always insightful to discover and explore patterns in one’s life. What is it about trees set against an open sky or field that attracts my attention? Draws camera to eye? Why does it call out to me in that way?  And if the eye is the window to the soul as the ancients believed, what then of the camera's aperture? And of the one who opens and closes it?

On the other hand, discovery brings conscious awareness with it. And conscious awareness affects the act of exploration. It affects how we see. I think of those zen books on seeing here.

               Lake Chautauqua

It’s harder to let go of preconceptions and simply see – see the essence of a place or thing -- when you’re simultaneously remembering, doing a comparative search not only of what stands before you but of what you’ve done before.  Remembering can certainly help clarify, can help tweak your aim for the better, but it can also stultify vision.

What once drew your attention spontaneously and openly has become a thing with a name. A thing you’ve seen before. And that creates a veil, or worse, a wall, that makes seeing the essence of a place or thing that much more challenging.

                Along Antietam Creek

The Studio Tour

The first weekend of the Orange County Artists Guild Open Studio Tour has come and gone and this coming Saturday and Sunday will close out the Tour for this year.

Traffic was light last Saturday and for that I was actually thankful. It rained in the morning and remained bone chillingly cool and damp throughout the day. Since I show outdoors, (under open cover), lighter than usual traffic meant being able to stay inside from time to time where it was warm and dry. I spent the time printing note cards of my work that I offer for sale.

Sunday was a beautiful Fall day here in central North Carolina. Turnout was steady, interested, and interesting. There are always good questions and comments from visitors. Over the years, I’ve learned a lot from the encounters.

The days in between the two weekends are like none other throughout the year for me – maybe something like the week between Christmas and New Year’s for folks who work in an office. I know some work places just shut down during Holiday Week, others work with a reduced staff. No matter, it’s rarely very productive. 

For me, it’s not a week when I start something new so there's a bit of idleness and waiting to the days. It is a week when I think about my work in ways I don’t always think about it. The financial comes into play here, as well as deeper and darker questions concerning value and worth of the work, of me, of my path in this life.

Inevitably, a sense of melancholy creeps into the equation. And I try to counter that with thoughts of future projects, new directions, new resolutions. 

Just this morning I got a chance to look, only for a second time, at the Spain and Portugal contact sheets. Narrowing down my choices for gum printing. Also trolling though some other work from the past year. 

The thought of being back in the darkroom is growing stronger as the busyness of recent months begins to pass.